The Return and Departure

Tonight I pack, and tomorrow morning at some ungodly hour, I will be heading down to the land of the Orioles, great crab restaurants, and at least a couple of friendly bloggers (if anybody is still speaking to me any more).

After a harrowing couple of weeks, I am looking forward to getting out and away.  The work pressure ends at the same time I board that Amtrak train tomorrow, so I can get officially back to blogging on a daily basis again.  Which is good, because I have a lot to write about from the past couple of weeks.  I have so missed having time to do this, but after putting in insane days, and getting an hour here and there with MLA, and not having more than 4 hours to sleep any given day for the past 10 days, I just wasn’t able to sacrifice any of those 240 minutes of sleep a night for blogging.

But tomorrow that all changes.  Post number one… Live from Amtrak.

I really should start packing… but I am not even home yet.  This is gonna be fun. tick…tick..tick.

So, who can tell me what to do in the greater Baltimore (Inner Harbor?) area?

TMI Tuesday #143 School Days Edition

1. What were you known as in HS (Jock, Princess, Geek)

I didn’t fit into any one clique.  I played soccer and fit in with the jocks, I was part of the drama club, so I was a  a weirdo or gay depending on who you asked.  I spent a year on the chess club, but that was even a bit too nerdy for me, but I did with the Computer Science award, fitting me in with the geeks.  I seem to simultaneously fit in with everyone and yet no-one at at the same time.
2. What were you really?

Individual.  There was rarely any single group I wanted to be soley in to the exclusion of others.  If you have to categorize me somewhere, I was a loner among groups.
3. If you could go back and tell your 16 year old self one thing, what would it be?

“Make a move.”  I was far too “friendly” back then, and was “a friend” to many, many girls my age.  More than a couple of which told me in retrospect that they were waiting for me to do/say something to make it more, but I never did.  Of course, on the other side of that, the few I did try “didn’t see me like that.”  So, I guess besides, “make a move” to remind myself it is a numbers game.  (Something I need to remind myself about now as well).
4. If you could erase one moment from your school days what would it be?

I don’t generally like these questions, because even though I could point to one of any number of incidents that at the time seemed like the end of the world, all of these experiences have come to make me who I am today… and I kind of like me as I am, so I wouldn’t want to do or erase anything that would potentially change that.

5. Who did you not date (or more) that you wish you did?

As I said in number three, this is a scenario that played itself out repeatedly for me in my High School Years.  I was always the “dear friend,” and while I wanted more, it “wasn’t there” or somebody “don’t want to ruin” what we had.  It is funny, as I think about it, I almost want to go the other way (despite what I said in #4), there is the one that I did land, where I was in over my head with somebody “so out of my league” that I almost wish we had dated for less time… almost.
Bonus (as in optional): If you went to prom, describe your outfit.

Black Tuxedo with the stripe down the pant legs, While Tuxedo Shirt with Burgundy Ruffles that matched her corsage.

TMI Tuesday: Thursday Edition

No, I am not going to disappear again, work has just been kicking my ever loving ass this week.  Will return again on Saturday.

1. LUST: Besides your current Significant Other who do you lust for or have you lusted for?

I’m not sure this is quite the appropriate place to put this since some of them read this blog, though at least one already knows it.

2. GLUTTONY: What food brings out your inner glutton?

Oddly enough… Hamburgers… but only on the grill.  Good BBQ hamburgers can turn me into an outright pig.

3. GREED: What are you greedy for?

Oral Sex.  No surprise here huh?… well, depending on how you look at it.  It is important to note I did not say “blow jobs” which would probably be more common.   As I have mentioned on here at least once before, my goal in life is to be the single best cunnilinguist on the planet.  All I need is some more volunteers so I can practice/perfect it some more.

4. SLOTH: What is your plan for an ideal day of sloth?

Sand/Ocean/Beach Chair/Frozen Fruity Drinks with an umbrella

5. WRATH: Describe a time that you let out a can of whoop ass on someone.

This is not my style. I am not one to retaliate big and strong. I prefer small calculated strikes.

6. ENVY: Who or what do you envy? Why?

I envy anybody who is happy with where they are in life. This is something I rarely have come to attain. I have a real bad “grass is always greener” mentality and am rarely happy with where I am “at the moment”

7. PRIDE: Have you ever had to swallow your pride? What are you proud of?

I swallow my pride a little bit every day to try and keep peace at home. Even when I am “strong” I am still swallowing some pride to keep this together when it would probably be less stressful (to put it politely) to get the hell out.

My greatest sense of pride comes from MLA. She is simply the best kid in the world. (nah, I’m not biased)

TMI Tuesday #141 - Marriage Edition

By the title, it sounds like a bad edition of TMI Tuesday to hop back on the bandwagon with, but what the heck.

1. Do you believe in marriage?
Yes, I do.  Surprised?  I am.  While I don’t necessarily think it is for everybody, and I really question the whole “one person forever” thing, it does work for some people, so yes, I do believe.

2. What is marriage to you?
Marriage is a commitment between two people.  It doesn’t necessarily mean monogomy, it certainly doesn’t mean “people of the opposite sex” it is the cojoining of two people into a loving commitment to each other.

3. If you are married, why did you do it? If you are not, why have you not married?
Why?  That is a question I ask myself every day.  At the time, I thought I had found the right person that shared a common belief system, and we had a lot in common.  Firming that commitment up seemed like the right decision… at the time.
4. Do you believe in divorce?
Sure, I do.  People can make mistakes.  People change.  If you are not compatible (and have nothing else to tie you in), then why would you not get a divorce.  You have a husband that beats you, and you are supposed to “tough it out” because somebody says that anything else is “wrong?”  Dumb.
5. If you are divorced, why did you do it? If you have not, are there certain circumstances under which you would agree to a divorce?
Incompatibility of any sort is acceptable reasons, in general to get a divorce.  Children certainly make a difference, but is not solely a reason to stay… depending on circumstances.  Any physically abusive relationship is and should be dead in the water immediately.  There is nothing to save in that scenario (except perhaps somebodies life).  Anything that hurts the kids or risks harm is reason.  (Alcoholic, gambler, drug use, etc).  Religion is NOT a reason to stay together.  Every religion has an “out” for exceptional circumstances, meaning that higher spiritual being understands in “certain circumstances” there are reasons that a person needs to get out.  Just because your priest, minister, rabbi, cleric or other religious “authority” doesn’t agree… (s)he is not the final judge, and can not say with any absolute authority which is or isn’t a “valid” reason.

Bonus (as in optional): [ed note:I am not trying to spark a get political debate, I am much to superficial for that]Do you believe that same sex marriages are a threat to traditional marriages?

Well, I hit on this in one of the above questions, but allow me to expound to be clear.  There is no valid reason that members of the same sex should not be allowed to “marry”  in a legal sense.  If a particular faith does not choose to recognize it, that is their choice and right to do so… it is their belief system and they can believe whatever they wish.  However, there is no valid legal reason for this.

A long time ago, interracial and interfaith marriages were viewed as poorly as gay marriage is today.  In some areas of the country, and in some religious organizations, such things are still viewed as an “abomination” by those people.  But the government has (correctly) taken no steps to attempt to outlaw marriages of this sort.  Same thing with divorce.  Since some churches choose not to recognize a divorce, they will not marry that person again.  So, there are “civil ceremonies” which allow marriage from a legal perspective whether or not it is condoned by any particular religion.  The same should hold true here.

To the silly question, is it a “threat” to marriage?  Of course not.  It is a threat to the control that certain religious faction attempt to hold over people, and their claim to “absolute” power.  But it is not a threat to marriage in general.  Marriage is about commitment, and some will say about love.  Anything that promotes that, whether it be between a man and a woman, two men, or two women, should be celebrated, not mocked.  Anything less is really self defeating to the “institution” of marriage.

Always something there to remind me

I have to sidetrack off of the back story for a moment.  Just to say, if I look (not even hard), there is always something there to remind me of just how… useless… SWMNBN can be. 

Last night (well I guess technically this morning) my uncle passed away.  It was not a big shock, as he has been sick for some time now, though his rapid decline lately did catch us a bit off guard.  He will only be waked one day (Wednesday) and buried the following (Thursday).  Wednesday is the day that SWMNBN normally works late, and apparently “can’t” adjust her schedule (or take a day off) so that I can attend the wake.  I will also be attending the funeral alone.

Now, in reality, for the most part I am actually OK with this.  Either that, or I have just become so accustomed to dealing with her, that there is no shock value and I had just already determined that this is what she will do, so in my head I rationalized it out that “this would be best anyway.”

Something though just gnaws at me, though.  Because even though I alright with things working out this way, I really would expect a normal human being to act a bit differently, to be more compassionate, more accomodating.  She can change appointments, this is sort of a one shot deal… but I guess there is always something there to remind me that she just is not all that close to normal (or at least my definition of it).